A message landed in my inbox. It was a meme share followed by a friend’s counterargument. And I found it so compelling that I took a screenshot of it. And proceeded to forgot about it until a year later when Memories reminded me of it today.
It went a little something like this:
Meme: “Women are expected to work like they don’t have children and raise children as if they don’t work. Sending love to every woman who feels she’s being measured by impossible standards.”
Friend: “You mean the standard we’ve applied to men since the dawn of time?
“It’s a great point, no doubt, and I couldn’t agree more, but it isn’t a WOMEN’S issue. It’s a real family-life issue.
“Parenting in and of its self is the act of living to an impossible standard. That’s the point. If you feel you’re not balanced enough and you want to give more time to your kids and also provide more opportunities for them and also be more accomplished at work and also be a moral compass, and also etc etc etc you will by default feel as though you can never be good enough. And you can’t. And that’s the point. It’s not a destination thing with being a mom or dad. It’s a journey thing… none of us are “good enough” and we shouldn’t be striving to be.”
So I’ve been chewing on that today. A day where I’ve wanted to pull my hair out with my kids. And the house. And all the things I feel like I’m not doing.
And sharing it here, because maybe it’s something you need to ponder, too.